No.
Remind me not to let Janie out of the house. Even though she doesn't really leave it in the first place...but anyways. Janie borrowed Jen's fake ID Saturday night so we could partake in the festivities at Lava Lounge.
Bad idea.
She wore a dress (mine) that barely covered her groin. The entire night I had to remind her to keep her legs closed.
Also, she drank.
Bad idea.
So there we are in this dark cave of a club when Janie simply disappears. I'm in total big sister mode and immediately track her down.
I find her sitting down on a couch, flanked by Rastafarian's on each side. Their names are of metal ores ( i.e. platinum, silver, gold, copper). They are bewitched by some story she is spinning. Her groin is showing. Lisa becomes concerned that she has rubbed off on Janie, cuz we all know what Lisa is like when she drinks. Anyways.
After this incident, Lisa and I drag her back to the dance floor where she is (temporarily) safe from unplanned pregnancies.
So then Mic Terror arrives (YAY!).
I introduce him to Janie who totally wigs out. I mean lets face it, he is the biggest celebrity of all time.
Soon Janie's thirst for trouble beckons her. Once again, Janie is again missing in action.
I find her snuggled up to some random Murder Clubber ( they're trouble ladies, stay awayyyyyy). Sweet nothings are being whispered. No good can come of this. Mic Terror sees whats going down. He doesn't wholly disapprove however. A small wrinkle of a smile appears on his face.
"How old is yo sisturr?" he inquires.
"19" I respond ( she actually 20, but i forget these things easily).
"Oh well that's a good age for making babies" he states matter-of-factly ( he knows these things).
To make a long story short, Janie was totally OOC that night, and also a total babe magnet.
Now the question is, with Lollapalooza weekend approaching and our schedule jam packed with after parties, do I allow Janie to come? Will she channel Katy Perry and explore lesbianism (is that a word?)? Will she forgo underwear and pull a Lezlo? Will she find herself "with child"? All of these are interesting options, and for the sake of the entertainment level of this blog, lets hope.
My inspiration is running pretty thin.
2 comments:
maybe if i wasn't kept captive in my room (caged cell) all the time, I wouldn't have to resort to such drastically jerry springer-ish ativities, ever thought about that?
anyways, i was thinkin of getting myself a baby. could entertin me. ill keep it around to do odd favors for me- much like the monkeys that paraplegics are given by the state.
so....i say take me to lolla afterparties, and you will not regret it.
at least with me around you always look completely normal.
your welcome.
thanks for posting that adorb photo of me channeling the corpse bride.
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