It's over....

I think I just accidentally ingested Windex.

I have been trying in vain to clean the windows at work and every time I attempt to do them, they just end up with more streaks and smudges.

I just ate a granola bar and i think i accidentally soaked it with Windex. But I'm kinda not so upset at the prospect of my imminent, chemical induced death. Lets be real, I'm sure Cheetos are far more toxic to my system than Windex...But really, the world is coming to an end anyways.
I'm reading an article in the newspaper about something called the "latte effect", which is how people are cutting out tiny purchases ( i.e. lattes) because of the rising costs of gas and necessities such as eggs, milk, and bread. This is SO depressing.
I am so upset. Why oh why do I have to live through such a hard time. I suppose every generation must endure some sort of hardship. My grandparents had the depression and the holocaust. My parents had the Vietnam war. I have high prices for foamy, caffeinated beverages.
It's just that life seems so bleak now. This must be a sign from G-d, just to me that I need to re-evalutate my life. It is wayyyy to based in materialism.
New plan of action for life:

• Move to enchanted forrest
• Live in oversized mushroom house
• Make friends with bears, elves, gnomes, and other creatures
• Eat only berries and roots ( killer diet, btw)
• Lose attachment to all things material (including facebook)
• Fashion cell phone out of pine cones and tree sap